That time I was practically naked on Oxford Street...

#perfectlyyou
Last weekend I took part in the NuNude campaign #PerfectlyYou. A group of women of different skin tones, sizes, heights and other unique features all took to the streets of London to campaign for diversity, positivity and acceptance of all women. We were all wearing swimwear provided by NuNude.  NuNude have created a line of "nude" swimwear and lingerie in varying skin shades, creating more realistic nude shades than are widely available.


The concept of this campaign was to empower others to be comfortable in the skin they're in, we all had signs, which we held as we walked the streets together in solidarity.  Our signs represented negative comments that each of us had been called at some point in our lives. For example, mine said "You see fat...I see perfect"  Now let me just say here that in my opinion the word "FAT" is not a negative comment in itself.  It's a descriptive word, an adjective, one that simply describes me further. However many people throughout my life have flung this word at me in an attempt to belittle, hurt or offend me, so I bared reference to it in my sign.


Just like the rest of the thoroughly brave women who walked beside me, I felt empowered by the fabulous response we got from the public on the streets.  People were receptive to the fact that we were making such bold statements and sticking two proverbial fingers up at anyone who thinks that these things are attributes to things to be ashamed of.

I struggle with the word "perfect" personally.  I don't think that anything in this world is "perfect" as everyone's perception of what they deem as perfect is different, it's subjective. By me adding the words "I see perfect" I do not mean that being "fat" should be everyone's idea of perfect, I simply feel that I am perfectly fine with the way I am and I am happy and utterly confident in the skin I am in.
In today's society so many people deem that being overweight is unhealthy and undesirable and should be something that people should not wish to be, therefore anyone who is confident in a fat body is therefore glorifying obesity. *insert eye rolls*



So when NuNude posted a shot of me and Kay on their Instagram page, I was totally happy with sharing the image of myself.  The image was shared several times and has amassed over 70,000 likes so far. So what if you could see my tummy and chunky thighs, I was grinning like the Cheshire Cat, I was as happy as Larry (who's Larry? anyone know??) BUT...it seems that my fat ass seemed to offend a LOT of people too!

Some of the 1,700+ comments were lovely and supportive of the campaign and supported the message we were trying to convey, others took it upon themselves to be judge, jury and executioner over the pressing case of my health.

The only problem with that is...YOU CANNOT JUDGE A PERSON'S HEALTH BY LOOKING AT A PHOTO!



So many people assumed that I am unhealthy, likely to die of diabetes or a heart condition or that I am "two mouthfuls away from a gastric bypass" (their comments not mine!)  Many people even resorted to name calling, I was called a "Fat ass n***a", a "Fat c**t", a whale and many other colourful words...some even told me I should just kill myself, (nice eh?)  Many of the worst comments were deleted by the brand in an attempt to reduce offending me.


I am not naive, I understand that being overweight may exacerbate health problems but you cannot assume that because I am overweight that I suffer with these things.  You cannot assume I am lazy or that I "spend all day shoving cake in my fat gob" (how do they know my secret!) I don't need these people to worry for my health, I don't need them to assume that I do not exercise or that I am unfit. I certainly don't wanna hear about the fact that they are so repulsed by me that I should take my own life!  I would love to know if these keyboard warriors would be so brazen if they were stood in front of me?  If they knew me or actually had enough of a brain to do a little research on the person they were slating, would they still think the same?  What is so criminal about being overweight and more importantly, who the hell gave them the right to pass judgement on me or my health?  To be perfectly honest if fat is the worst that these guys can do, then I will take it all day long, cos I would much rather be known as a fat girl than a complete ass-hat!


Many people reached out to me personally, asking if I was okay after reading some of the comments. I am grateful for the look out, but really keyboard warriors do not phase me in the slightest. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions and I understand that I will not be everyone's cuppa. I do not need their concern over my health.  I responded, I said my piece, I had no desire to retaliate to any of the comments personally or individually.  


I consider myself extremely lucky that I have the mental tools to allow me to treat that negativity like water off a duck's back.  Many people unfortunately aren't at this stage of acceptance and could have found the comments devastating.  A few years ago, I would have not been so strong, my mental health would have taken a severe beating.  Imagine if I had not had such thick skin and I had been so hurt by their opinions that I resorted to taking my own life.  I'm not gonna lie, this is really my first real taste of trolling and it does hurt to hear the comments, but I do not dwell on their toxic negativity and I certainly do not let the words penetrate me. They are JUST WORDS and they are JUST trolls and they cannot hurt me.


If you can take one thing away from my experience, take this...
Trolls are ass-hats! If you ever are faced with this kind of experience, know that you are all kinds of awesome and the negative opinions of others do not define you in any way.  You do not need the validation of anyone else to make you whole.  If you are truly happy within yourself then no ones' negativity can penetrate your skin. Don't retaliate - it fuels their fire. Don't let them win - silence is way louder, ignore the ignorant...and keep fucking smiling!


xXx

Learning to Love Yourself

appreciation



New Video up on YouTube talking about learning to love yourself, filming this video was prompted by reading some of the comments on a recent FB comment thread within a plus size group.  This video is meant for anyone who is struggling with accepting who they are or finding it hard to love themselves.  I hope that you reach out....

I'm here xx

The Kurve Kit; The Keys to Confidence - Episode 1 Part 1

#thekurvekit

Introducing "The Kurve Konfidential series" Brought to you by The Kurve Kit, showcasing 5 fierce women who want to share their experiences on subjects such as building confidence, self love, body positivity and acceptance. It would mean the world to us to get your feedback, so please subscribe, like, share and/or leave a comment. Let us know what you think...

Kicking off the first series of The Kurve Konfidential, we have Episode 1 Part 1 - The Keys To Confidence. 
We focus on two main questions,
1. When did you start to love your body?
2. Describe a time you lacked body Confidence.

We hope that this will invoke some responses from the community to share their own stories with us, or even inspire someone to speak out about their issues and tips to overcome them.

 So here are the 5 ladies involved;

Francesca
Kurve Kit Creator, Blogger, Curvesome Yoga Ambassador, Stylist, Vlogger
Instagram https://instagram.com/thekurvekit/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/kurvekit
Blog: https://thekurvekit.wordpress.com/
Facebook https://www.facebook.com/thekurvekit



Tanya Brannan
Plus Size Blogger, Model
Instagram: https://instagram.com/secretplussizeg...
Twitter: https://mobile.twitter.com/SecretPSGo...
Blog: http://secretplussizegoddess.blogspot...
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Secretplussi...


Michelle Carter
Plus Size Blogger, Model
Instagram: https://instagram.com/divine_delights/
Twitter: https://mobile.twitter.com/Dazzle_Divine
Blog: https://myfatandi.wordpress.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/myfatandi






Judi Love
Comedienne, Actress, Writer, Vlogger.
https://m.facebook.com/1Judi.love
https://mobile.twitter.com/1Judilove
https://instagram.com/1judilove/

And me of course!! (but I'll skip the intros)

Big Thanks to our Creative Director & editor Likwid Design Solutions

We hope you like our first episode and can't wait to share the next one with you too...

Xx

Dare to Bare??

#dare2bare
In an effort to promote the fact that women are a thing of true beauty and that we come in all different shapes and sizes I would like to share with you something that I hope will show my true vulnerability.
This is me....these are the photos I took back in April for the Curvy Kate #StarInABra lingerie competition.

No edits
No airbrushing
Just me...

I am not perfect - far from it....but I am me and I am HAPPY!

I accept my flaws and imperfections - but this is who I am and I am unashamed.

I continue to strive to be the happiest & healthiest version of myself possible.


This post is for all the women out there who ever feel self conscious about their bodies, I understand...but instead of beating yourself up about it...celebrate the things you do love instead.

So in true spirit of growth & self acceptance, I ask anyone reading this....

...do you #dare2bare



Make that bold choice and prove to yourself that you are beautiful - warts & all! Post a selfie of yourself baring all - be as daring as you like, but just make sure you use the hashtag; #dare2bare.

I showed myself at my most vulnerable, hoping to inspire others to step outside of their own comfort zones and share parts of themselves they would usually hide away and celebrate that in all its beauty. You don't have to expose all, just test your own limits. 

Make sure you link me to any of your posts - I would love to see yours too :)

Xx

Can I get an "AMEN" up in here??

acceptance
Every single human in the world deserves the right to be happy!  Without exception!!

Other people's opinions hold too much weight.

The minute you stop taking stock of how other people perceive you to be, will be the minute you begin your journey to self acceptance and in time...self love.

I've been watching a load of RuPaul's Drag Race recently and she says a line which really hits home for me....

"If you can't love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else!"

and to that I give the biggest "A-MEN" cos you have to love yourself first.

We all have flaws and parts of ourselves that we don't love, but those flaws are in our hands to change should we want to.

Once you love you - others will see the inner beauty surpass the outer beauty and you will positivity glowing!

YOU CAN DO IT!

I believe in you!

First step - look in that mirror....right now....do it...now pick one thing that you dislike about yourself.....got it....now instead of thinking negatively about it - find a positive about it (no matter how small or insignificant the positive may be - there will be one) Now say that positive spin out loud....BE PROUD...now repeat it.....and again (with attitude...baby) and keep saying it until something clicks and it will - that click is acceptance!  Once you feel that click - remember that feeling and keep flicking back to it when you're feeling low.

My example; Stretch Marks

So my positive spin - These are my tiger stripes, my daily reminder that my baby girl changed my life for the better. I love her - so I love my stripes!!

I try to do this at least once a day and it really does help - you feel like a right wally at first - but eventually you will find more and more things that once were a hindrance that you can now be thankful for.

Xx

What changed?? My Body Confidence story

#psbloggers
Up until September 2014 I had severe dental problems. Lots of missing teeth, broken teeth and decay. I was born with a calcium deficiency which meant I could eat something as soft as a banana and my teeth would break. I was suffering with a severe case of dental phobia after many dental visits ending badly, poor advice and bad experiences. I couldn't go to the dentist. I was ashamed of the way I looked and I was ridiculed for it.


Left to Right - Me age 15 - before pregnancy.  Me age 17 about 6 months after my daughter was born.

I was very depressed due to my teeth and my weight which I have battled with for years. I doubled in weight throughout pregnancy going from a size 12 to a 28 in 9 months. I was a dance student but I couldn't carry on dancing due to my weight gain and baby bump and being left by my boyfriend 7 months pregnant nearly broke me. 

It had taken me 14 yrs with various different methods like exercise, weight watchers, slimming world, diet pills and referral to a dietician to bring my weight down to roughly 18 stone and a size 22. I'd had enough I sought help from my GP as I had hit rock bottom and I was on the verge of a breakdown. 

It was only when one Doc finally listened & referred me for CBT, to the bariatric team at St Georges Hospital to seek advice about potential surgical intervention & to Kings College Hospital to undergo full dental reconstruction that I started to feel the fear ease.  I was ready to take back my life.

Having my teeth done was the catalyst to regain my confidence and build myself back up again. I found my smile. I was finally happy and the positive feedback from all you bloggers and family and friends help me learn to love my body.  I started setting myself little achievable goals and I started to realise that if I conquered my biggest phobia I was capable of anything. I started moving more, I downloaded a pedometer on my phone and committed myself to taking 10,000 steps per day. I hate walking, I would take a cab from my house to my car if I could. I didn't change what I ate I still enjoyed what I love and I bloody love food and cake and doughnuts and chocolate and sweets and all things in between, I just tried to moderate it, like maybe not eating a doughnut a day plus plus a Wispa and a big dinner. I am not a big portions gal so I just needed to curb my daytime snacking at work (I still struggle with this...I reckon I always will)

I found that by me moving more alone was changing my body shape, giving me more definition in my bum and waist and seeing the progress spurred me on to try harder.
Joining LouiseBunnyHop dance & fitness class has boosted my confidence tenfold. Being in a room of real women with varying body shapes and sizes gave me more enthusiasm. I wasn't going to be picked on because of my weight or size.  I was embraced and welcomed. At first I told myself just ease yourself back in, do one class and soon enough I was doing 3 a week as I love it so much.

Since I committed to moving more I have shed just under a stone but I have dropped 2 dress sizes sitting comfortably in an 18/20.

Having a solid support network is what has got me through, I have made friends with people in similar situations at every step of the way and having people who relate and do not judge has been the most helpful tool.

It's funny that my teeth were holding me back from achieving a dream that I had had since I was young. I always wanted to Model and be a MUA and now I am doing both of these things. I have more ambition more dreams. I want to complete Bunny training an become a Louise BunnyHop instructor, I love dancing and I want people to feel how I feel when I go to her classes; empowered, confident and full of a new found lease of life.

I am loving the definition of my curves which I never have seen on me before, it's giving me more confidence to step out of my comfort zone with regards to embracing fashion.

My most important fact is that I am happy and that is making me strive to continue on this journey towards being the healthiest version of myself possible.

I love my body and that makes me want to take care of it which I had not been doing for many many years.

I hope that gives you a bit of an insight to me, if you ever want someone to talk to about your journey I'm here...I'd love to hear your stories.
Xx

 Me before dental work & in the immediate weeks after surgery.

My new smile :)

#WeAreTheThey

#wearethethey
When Debz of The (Not So) Secret Diary of a Wannabe Princess created the #WeAreTheThey hashtag to stand up to Jamelia's harsh words on Loose Women last week, I never in a million years would've thought we could make it trend on Twitter. I am astounded by the strength & resilience we as a Plus Size Community have together. Standing proud we hit back at the statement from Jamelia in which she stated,
 
“I do not think it's right to facilitate people living an unhealthy lifestyle."
 
“They should be made to feel uncomfortable when they go in and can't find a size.”
 
Whilst I believe that everyone is entitled to an opinion how you share that opinion should be considered.  To make someone feel ashamed, hurt or embarrassed, segregated or unworthy is really not okay. It is a form of discrimination.
 
We are Human and funnily enough we are all unique. We come in different shapes & sizes, so why can't we all just accept that and not seek to shame each other for our differences.
 
So in revolt the plus size community took to social media putting a face to the "They" that Jamelia was singling out. The "They" is not a faceless embodiment of beings in society... we are real people...
#WeAreTheThey
 
Here was my 2 pence worth....
 
We are nothing to be ashamed of, we are strong, we are not the minority, we can be happy, we can be healthy, we come in all shapes and sizes, we are beautiful...we are women...
 
#WEARETHETHEY
 
I am 31, 5ft 4, size 18/20.  I have been a size 12 and I have been a size 28 and I have worked my ass of to get to where I am now.  I am a happy, confident woman, I am a mother, I work hard, I support my family, I am a signed Plus Size/Curve Model & Fashion and Beauty Blogger. I am beautiful and I deserve to be happy...I strive to be healthier but I am not ashamed of who I am.
 
#IAmMe
 
#Stophating #nohatezone #wearethey #bodyshamingisnotok #itsdisrimination #everybodyisbeautiful #allgirlsrock #effyourbeautystandards #psbloggers #thepsbloggers #empowerment #bodyconfidence #selflove #loveyourself
 

Why I love being part of the Plus Size Community

body confidence
Today has been an extremely busy day on social media with all the hype surrounding the Channel 4 documentary; Plus Size Wars.

I watched it  & instantly felt so empowered to see blogger friends and idols representing ladies all over the world.

In this debate I sit firmly in the PRO CHOICE category; Every BODY is beautiful and you should be free to live your life how you want to regardless of what size/shape you are.  

As long as you are happy & healthy that's all that matters in my opinion.  Now I find that health is not just about how fit you are but it also extends to your mental health too.    I have struggled with yo-yo weight all my life and have had my fair share of health issues and suffered depression due to my weight too. I strongly believe that happiness starts from within and if we can promote confidence & love for the skin you are in then anything is possible.

You may reach a point where you feel you want to become fitter or drop some weight or tone up or gain a few pounds or lose a few inches or change any other aspect of ourselves that we may not be happy with and you know what I think that's positive because it acknowledges that we are always changing and we are all unique.

Some people are happy the way they are....some people want change...and both are just as beautiful in my eyes.

I am so pleased to be surrounded by people who empower & support others, a family of strangers who are infused by common interests whether it be fashion, beauty, food, hobbies...we are all wonderfully creative & gorgeous individuals.  I love that you are not judged for being you, that you are accepted and loved regardless of what size you are.  I love that you are welcomed with open arms, that you are supported through rough times and celebrated through the good.

I am proud to be part of this family!

Xx


#MsSurreyCurve2015 Made Press!!

#mbbc2015
I met with Kevin Black the editor of my local paper; Oxted County Border News recently to talk about Miss British Beauty Curve.  Here's what he said;



She is big, beautiful and wants to be an inspiration to all ladies who may be worried that they are too large for a comfortable life. And 31 year old Croydon born Katherine Henry, a mother of one and now firmly part of the Oxted scenery, has proved that her 18-20 size - she weighs in at 108 kilos - could be a winner.
For Kat, who works for a law firm in the City, is one of the finalists in the Miss British Beauty Curve 2015 competition. The grand final is at Epsom Playhouse on August 8 and she is representing Surrey. "I want Surrey to be proud of me" she said.
Miss British Beauty Curve is designed to empower ladies who are UK size 14+ to celebrate the beauty that being larger holds.
"Beauty comes from within" said Kat who has lived in Oxted for five years. "It is not a terrifying thing to be big."
That's the message Kat is keen to spread to adults and youngsters through her work as an ambassador for Ms Curvaceous UK. She was obviously chosen for her vivacious, outgoing personality. She would like to visit schools and talk to students about being big - not to be confused with obesity.
"My goal is to inspire people and promote body confidence to all body shapes and sizes." she says. "I really feel it's important to instil that acceptance especially in the younger generation."
Kat, who is signed to a model agency, will be contacting local businesses to gain support for her attempt on the Miss British Beauty Curve contest, not with financial help but by publicising her desire to help the larger lady.
For details see Kat's blog and Facebook pages www.henryskat.blogspot.co.uk or https://m.facebook.com/henryskat2014 and you can also see www.missbritishbeautycurve.com


The Oxted County Border News is a locally circulated paper which is printed weekly, it contains all the local happenings and is a brilliant forum to celebrate Surrey's achievements.

This story will feature in this week's edition which you will be able to view online once published here >>> http://www.oxted-today.co.uk/

All photo credit to Kevin Black

Katie, Was it really necessary?

askkatie
Firstly; This guy hit the nail on the head here;

"We" didn't do this to you, nor did "we" force you to do this...you took on this challenge of your own volition! 

 There is no escaping that the point that she is precariously trying to make has value; yes we are all aware that being sedentary and consuming more calories than the clinical guidelines state will contribute to people gaining weight.

 What she may not be accounting for is the people who are overweight due to illness, disease or medication.

 I think she is going to find it hard to shift the weight.  Weightloss is not easy, there is no quick fix and it is a struggle that many people endure. 

 It was refreshing to see her acknowledge the similarity between her emotional connection to exercise/work and that of a person who connects food to emotion or love and accepting that it would not be simple for someone to say to her, stop loving her child, or stop working and sit down and her listen because she has that emotional connection to these things.  

 I am forever being told by medical professionals that my being overweight is not OK as it comes with health complications, some of which can be life threatening.   Katie was deemed as being Underweight and this in itself could also cause health issues.  All the while, I accept that my weight may cause me difficulties, but this is my choice, my life and I love who I am. I would like to minimise any potential health issues in later life, so I continue to strive to be the healthiest version of myself possible. Two very influential ladies gave me clarity on this point this evening, which has led me to make changes to my original post, I was so pumped after watching the show that I did not make myself clear which led to my original words being taken the wrong way.  I apologise if my previous comment caused any offence - it was not my intention and I hope that you can see that by the nature of my post in it's entirety.

 I believe we are all different and we all make our own choices as to how we live our lives. It is NOT acceptable to condemn someone for ANY reason.  

 But in life, who really IS perfect?  Are we all not people, with real feelings?

 To say someone is less capable of performing a job because of their body weight is unacceptable. It's fat shaming!
To criticise each other because of size, weight, race, gender, sexual orientation, dress sense, accent, height, hair colour, eye colour (OR ANY DIFFERENCE THAT WE MAY HAVE) is UNACCEPTABLE!  ANY SHAMING IS UNACCEPTABLE!! It's discrimination!

 We are human - we have flaws, why can't we accept each other at face value or merit?  

 I said I wouldn't but I caved & I tweeted @KTHopkins tonight; 
" does body size make us any less a woman or a human? Does ur lesser weight give you the right to criticise others?"
Needless to say - I have had no response, nice to see that she took the time to respond to the more degrading tweets, but as this PR stunt was geared towards making her "brand" trend to hell & back, I figured I should expect nothing less!

 In these times we should be trying to teach our children that #HateBreedsHate and #ComplimentsAreFree but how can we do that when these kind of statements are trending all over social media?

 What about empowering our young ones? Teaching acceptance, confidence and self love? What about teaching them to have the courage to change the things in their lives that they can control?   

 Why is it OK for people to condemn and generalise all "fat" people.

 Where does she get off saying things like "take that you fat bastards?"  The statement was rude, obnoxious and totally unnecessary!  There have got to be much more effective ways to help people lose weight, this way may not really have the desired outcome she was expecting!

 I am glad I watched it, although I'm not sure why.  It was a bonus, however to see some of our lovely #PSbloggers representing us; +Leah XL Channel in particular.  Well done for speaking out, girl!

 Thank you to +Debz A & Hannah Boal for the constructive criticism :)

 What are your thoughts?


Music to Empower You - Let the music heal your soul :)

#MCUK
I truly believe that Music is like chicken soup for the soul.  When I am down and in the need of some words of encouragement or positivity, I turn on this playlist, scream the lyrics at the top of my lungs & dance around like no one is watching and I guarantee you by the end of it I am feeling a 100 times better.

 I have chosen each song personally to create a vibe. Some of these songs are empowering, some hold strong positive messages, some can be counted as big female anthems and others are just feel good tunes.

 So take a listen and tell me you don't feel empowered after this....

 *Please note - there are quite a few songs on this playlist so feel free to browse* 

New Project/Collaboration for 2015 with Ms Curvaceous UK

#MCUK
I was approached today by Theo of Streamline Empire, the brains behind +Ms Curvaceous UK to become an Ambassador of the MCUK Brand.  I am positively brimming with excitement at the prospect of such a huge opportunity.

 It is a real chance for me to promote a movement that is very close to my heart.  The MCUK brand represents real women, offering them a chance to shine regardless of their size.  Modelling has always been something that I have wanted to aspire to do, but because of my weight, body shape and dental issues I never had the confidence to take that step.  MCUK changed that in 1 day!  It altered my perspective on what is possible, it brought me one step closer to a dream that I never thought possible.

When I happened across a tweet about the chance to attend a FREE Plus Size Modelling workshop in London hosted by MCUK, I was beside myself.  I instantly signed up thinking #YOLO and what the hell did I have to lose.  At the same time I signed up to audition for the MCUK competition.  Now at that time I knew that with NO experience as a model, just a distinct love for a #selfie I had virtually no chance of making it through the audition, what I was sure of was the experience I would have would be a lasting memory and chance to prove to myself that I am capable of achieving anything in this lifetime.

 What I did not bargain for, was the friends I made, the opportunities it gave me and the fun I had.

 I walked into that room with no expectations, a blank canvas ready to see what MCUK had to offer. Based on the common misconception many people have about modelling, I expected to be greeted with a group of women with a frosty, up-tight attitude. I was wrong!

 I met a group of gorgeous, kind-hearted and inspiring women who to this day I remain friends with. Each one of those woman had a story to tell and I feel blessed and honoured to have met each one of them.

The day was empowering, the stories shared made me feel at ease and proud to be a part of such a movement.

 Now I am not entirely sure what being an Ambassador of the brand involves, but I have the opportunity to get involved with the Ms Curvaceous UK 2015 Grand Finale, write for the "Why Not Plus" blog and many other opportunities.

 From my understanding of the MCUK brand, they want to inspire and encourage women of all shapes and sizes to embrace their naturally curvaceous bodies. To change the media's mindset towards REAL women, to provide plus size models with a recognisable avenue within the industry to become noticed and not for the wrong reasons. To show that all women are beautiful regardless of size.

 Promoting self-empowerment, body confidence, self-love and acceptance is something that drives me.  I want to inspire people to love the skin they're in.  If these people want to change their lifestyles along the way to become healthier, happier and more confident people then that is a bonus and I am all for that.  However I am a firm believer that confidence starts from within; accepting your flaws and loving yourself has gotta start with number one (you) Each one of us has a journey to embark on and I want to help people achieve their dreams, by empowering them to be the best versions of themselves possible.

 I am on journey too and I hope that the support that I have gained from MCUK will continue to help me grow into the woman I want to be.

 I am extremely excited about the opportunity laid in front of me and I can feel that 2015 is going to be a very eventful year.

The Pressure to be Perfect

body confidence
Has anyone noticed how bitchy girls are these days? Especially teenagers; I have a 13 year old daughter and over the last few years I have really experienced some unacceptable behavior in young ladies and it got me thinking, where is this coming from?  What are we breeding here, a bunch of self-loathing, ill-mannered & downright nasty people that’s what.

I believe this really stems from one main thing which is imposed on children from such a young age; The Pressure to be Perfect.  These impressions last a lifetime and are extremely hard to shift once the seeds have been planted.

We are not promoting self-worth or love or acceptance and confidence but pushing these young children to be something which in my opinion is damn near impossible; Perfect!

What’s wrong with teaching children to love themselves a bit more, accept their imperfections and learn to praise each other rather than criticise?

These feelings don’t stop after puberty; that pressure continues into adult life.
 
I met a group of empowering, strong, beautiful women over the weekend and since we met we instantly clicked and have decided to try and stay in touch.  We have set up a group chat on Whatsapp and it really is like therapy because they all have stories to tell and support to offer and for once it is nice to find women who don’t judge and are all struggling with various problems yet they can offer advice to others rather than mean words. 

I am a real advocate of trying to be the best version of me possible and live in the here & now,  I am on a journey and the road may lead in many ways – I’m just gonna enjoy the ride!

Let’s spread the Love rather than Hate and communicate before it’s too late!


Teach that to your babies… it’s free and the gift is priceless!


The Hype about Fat Shaming - My opinion

body confidence

I must start by stating a few things here; I am a big girl. I am 5ft4 and weigh approx 111kg. I wear a size 20/22 in clothing. I would be classed by society as obese if not morbidly. I have battled with weight gain since the birth of my Daughter 13 years ago. I started pregnancy as a healthy & curvy (I've always been blessed with a chest) size 12. I ended my pregnancy as double that & then some. After I gave birth I was wearing size 28 clothes and I loathed the sight of me.  I have tried a multitude of diets, healthy eating plans, exercise regimes and cold turkey and I have seen results  after all I am no longer a size 28. I am nowhere near my goal weight (11 stone) or goal dress size; 14 but I am proud of my achievements so far and recognise I have a fair old way to go.

The point of this post is to give you my opinion on the current fat shaming saga.

No one should ever be allowed to shame anyone else for any reason; race, gender, religion,  size, sexual orientation or otherwise.  It should not be seen as ok to criticise anyone after all not any single one of us is perfect.

I agree that being overweight is not the healthiest way of living and I appreciate we should not condone obesity but I ask you, what is wrong with people loving the skin they are in and honouring their sizes whilst acknowledging we are not perfect but that's ok. We all have our personal crosses to bear and we all have journeys towards change to embark on.  

I don't see a problem with people celebrating their size whatever that may be.

I believe in body positivity and learning to love yourself and that makes change much easier. If you love yourself you are more likely to care about your health and wellbeing which could be a benefit to weight loss.

To shame a person because of their weight may not be a productive course of action to help them shift that weight. It could spiral them further downwards, cause depression, anxiety or even worse.

I say that if we love each other and ourselves a bit more we may be healthier, happier versions of ourselves.

What do you think??